Insomnia Monday… No Wait Wednesday lol

Okay I’m totally out of it.. and as the title shows on NO sleep.  I apologize in advance to my horrible writing mistakes in this post bc even though there is a spell checker, I’m notorious for putting wrong words spelt right in the wrong spot… now you’re feeling as confused as I am aren’t you? Good… I’m not alone then.

So I had 3 great days.  The 3 best days I’ve had in about 5 years.  I felt good, had some boxes and some Christmas crazy going on in the apartment and I just went nuts packing stuff.  My place feels hollow now and very echoy… sadly my neighbors sex life has seemed to become more echoy as well *shudders*

Susan my Social Service Worker, has a new student Aristha or something and every time I say it, I’m saying a totally different name lol.  She’s older, which I like.  And she and Susan came by today for me to meet her.  Aristha or whatever she is, is coming by tomorrow for her first session with me.  Zeus made it very clear she digusts him and wouldn’t let her go near him without flailing and running off to the tub to scream his usual grumpy rant.  Mind you bc I didn’t sleep… that means he didn’t either.

I got rid of a whole whack load of more stuff on the Free Cycle site.  Google it bitches, bc you can get and give away free stuff in your city.  Such a great idea, bc it saves so many items from going to the dump, and helps many people who don’t have a lot of money.  I’ve gotten some stupid items that turned out to be more of a pain, and I’ve gotten great things too like my bread maker which I love!  Definitely recommend it.  The only thing I’m waiting to give away now is my couch.

I’ve been reading a LOT lately.  I finished up the new CSI digi novel which was amazing!  Also read Bitch in the Kitch and the first of the series… cannot remember its name and I lent it to my step mom to borrow.  It’s about all the interesting facts to do with food with a lot of sarcasm and swearing thrown in… perfection.  Changed my whole ideal on eating and cooking too!  Bitch in the Kitch is actually one of the cookbooks so you’d want to read the first book obviously before buying it.  So funny too.  I’ve also finished one of the free novels I got with my Kobo.. The Preacher’s something or other.  Good but wouldn’t bother to recommend it to anyone.  And am now reading everything Edgar Allen Poe has ever written lol.  I love his short stories especially!  Oh!  And read the play, The Importance of Being Ernest… omg I LOVE it!  I wish it was longer, and that I could see it performed live!

Anyway, besides that I’ve been on the phone like a fat kid clings to the refrigerator and I hate it lol.  I hate the telephone!  So many little things disability needs done.  Proving that I’m moving bc of health conditions, proving I am approved and actually moving to the new apartment… weirdos.  And getting quotes sent over to them for movers.  What do they care so long as I give them a receipt?  Which they’ll need too lol.

Also been on the phone starting my month of doctors appointment bookings!  Had a horrible time getting a hold of anyone of Christmas and the week after.  My family doctor for my knee and fibromyalgia, and my sleep study.. Susan is taking me as well to see what all my tests have said since my numb brain won’t remember everything.  Then I have to run to the dentist on Monday with the student social service worker (the same program I’m in) and sign a consent for my needle poking dentist to get a hold of my Cardiologist.  Since he NEVER phones me back! Grrrrr.    As well the Crohn’s Disease dudes to make my check up appointment… yes it’s been almost a month on these new pills.  They are now helping greatly with the heart burn and acid burn in the stomach, BUT I still have nerve damage pain that doesn’t seem to go away no matter what they give me… except Amytripline which I can’t take thanx to Postural Orthostatic Tachycardia Syndrome.

So a lot of my facebook, etc. friends have noticed me being absent a lot.  A big part of it was just all the holiday business and being with family a lot.  And now my computer which has always been a piece of crap is getting even worse!  To write an email on facebook, I literally have to wait a good 20 minutes after I’ve finished typing it, for the computer to actually input it onto the screen!  It’s insane!  Surprisingly, knock on wood, this program so far isn’t being effected, but hotmail, facebook and yahoo mail seems to be very hard to manouver around without a lot of swearing and giving up to go sit on the couch and try it again later.

I hope you’re all well and not still pooped out from the holidays!  We all seem to slowly but surely coming back to our normal crappy selves lol.  Xo!

Ash,

Ahhhh Relaxation!

I had a GREAT birthday.  I gotta be honest, I didn’t feel too great though.  I got my sleeping messed up the day before, and was really later for my two major med.s and it messed my POTS up a bit.  I guess that’s a good sign that maybe my Beta Blocker is working though!

I went to my mom’s after her and Nick decorated the place.  He was going to do a Mad Hatter theme for me, but the poor little guy was so sick.  I guess he was up during the night with a fever of 102!  He was all excited to surprise me when I got there, but he ended up falling asleep on the couch.  You could tell he felt rough.

My sister and Nick surprised me by buying me way too much!  I’ve been looking for years, for a pumpkin scented candle, in one of those glass containers with a lid, and she found me one   It smells so yummy!  She also gave me the HellBlazer comics I picked out when we were shopping a while ago, a note book bc I’m always doing to do lists, and the little shit got me a gift card for Chapters so I could put some more books on my EReader!  I picked out Prophecy, the second digi novel by the guy who does CSI, and Mini Shopaholic.  I can’t wait to read them!!!

They had balloons on the wall, and streamers coming down from the light fixture above the table, and we had a yummy boiled dinner and my Grams homemade wackie cake which I LOVE!!!!  I also got a nice card in the mail from my friend Megan, and a picture of her and her daughter, who is growing up WAY too fast.  Speaking of pictures, I got from Amanda, Nick’s school photos too   So I have them all over my apartment now and one in my wallet to show off with my other nephew and nieces photos

I didn’t go to see the apartment yesterday bc I have a cold still, and now feels like it’s getting worse.  I could have gone, I just didn’t want to risk getting Susan my Social Service Worker sick.

This morning Marlene my Personal Support Worker is coming.  She’ll be here in about a half hour, and other than that I have nothing on the agenda until I got to the dentist in about a week and a half.  I’m not going to go to the Pauls family Christmas dinner tomorrow bc I’m feeling pretty rough, and I do not want to risk getting my uncle sick when he’s been so badly run down.  My dad will give me a nice guilt trip, but by the look of Nick yesterday, I’d say Amanda won’t be driving out there either, so he’ll just have to deal with it.

Anyway, I hope you’re all doing well, and I will write again soon, if not after my dentist appointment.  Take Care!

Ash,

 

Happy Unbirthday to You to You to YOU!

Marlene my Personal Support Worker came by… well I suppose yesterday now since it’s almost 5am lol.  She bought me this beautiful gray cardigan for my birthday.  It’s really comfy fabric, but has really cool stitching in the back.  It’s nice I never expected to get anything from her.  I am pretty sure she thought it was my birthday yesterday, bc she seemed all sad that I was just going to stay at home lol.

I actually ended up falling asleep after she left, and didn’t wake up until late into the night!  I woke up feeling full blown sick, but now it’s dulled back down to that cold I had with just a worse cough.  I am supposed to go to my Pauls family dinner this Saturday, and I don’t think I’ll be able to go sick bc my uncle Larry (at his and my aunt Reta’s house this year) has been on dialysis and been very ill.  I don’t want to risk making him worse!  But I’ll talk to my aunt later today, and ask her about it.

Susan, my Social Service Worker called today, and her friend found a cute small one bedroom house in the nice end of Belleville, in a house.  Apparently it’s very vacationy like and there’s a private backyard area!  She and I, are going to drive by to see the house this morning, and then next week, we are going to go see the apartment inside.  They’re willing to hold the place for February for me, which would be awesome, but I’d have to give my notice asap since I have to give this rental company notice 2 months beforehand.

Tuesday was busy but fun.  Amanda and Nick picked me up and we went to Walmart where I got coughed on by some &*%&%&*% guy that works there. lol yes, all people who cough on me are *&^*&%&*%’s .  Then we went back and dropped Amanda’s groceries off, then went to Shannonville, and the dropped mine off.  THEN, we went to the dollar store where I got a bunch of cool helpful things for around the apartment, that will be great for when my Fibromyalgia kicks in, like a jar opener, etc.

From there, we went and picked up my mom at work, and then went to Chapters, where I got my Kobo E Reader!  It comes with 100 books in it already, all classics, and then I got two free newer books.  One I actually own, but the other looks good.  The only shitty part about it, is that in order to get the two free ones, you still need to put your credit card info. in even though it won’t be charged.  Problem is, I don’t own a credit card!  GGggrrrr! lol.

Nick is too funny (he is only 4).  He was talking to my grandma who doesn’t have the best of hearing about both his and my birthdays, being this month.  He comes upstairs to where I am and asks me when my birthday is, and I told him, and he said that his birthday must be on the 3rd then since it’s after mine.  I explained his was after mine, but not until the 19th which would be two weeks and 3 days after mine.  He looks at me all disgruntled and says, “Ya, well that’s crap!!”  and stomps off to yell at my grandma for making him think it was closer lol.

Later today, for my actual birthday, since a lot of people thought it was on the first lol, I am going up to my mom’s where Nick picked out the theme for my birthday dinner… should be interesting.  My aunt Kelly got Halloween, and my sis got a princess theme lol.  But we are going to be having a boiled dinner my fav.  And instead of getting some fancy cakes that makes everyone feel like death after eating, my grams is making me her homemade chocolate Wacky Cake.  I love it!  It’s my favorite cake yum yum yum lol.  And doesn’t bother my stomach as much as store bought ones do!

Anyway, I am going to head out and take a bath, and attempt to sleep a few hours before Susan comes!  Hope you all are feeling good, and enjoying the cold weather!  I hear snow plows… lots of snow out, but not snowing I don’t think.  Hopefully it will be!  *hugs*

Ash,

Alright Catch Up Time

Hey

This morning I got a message from my dad drunk asking me to go to breakfast lol.

Zeus modelling with the new foot stool/ cubby

Him & Lois picked me up at 9 and we went to this place semi near me that I had never been to before.  It was cheap and delicious!  I decided since I NEVER eat normal breakfast meals because of POTS and Crohn’s, I would go all out today lol.  I got an egg, a couple slices of bacon, home fries and toast with strawberry jam. MMMmmm so good!  Been so long since I ate any of that crap lol.  Won’t be eating it again for a long time either, so it was nice

Lois (my step mom whom I love ) works at my old high school as a janitor supervisor, and when kids lose their stuff and it goes to lost and found, apparently the school only keeps it for so long before they get rid of it, and some of it is nice stuff!  So my step mom always grabs us stuff she thinks we’ll like LOL.  She got me a new pair of running shoes last year (they never have my size! 9) and she got me another pair this week! woo hoo! hehe.

new chair i mentioned before

Last night, was the first night I actually slept in 2 weeks or more.  I would get a couple hours in the later morning, but then I’d be up again all night.   Last night, I finally crashed… for four hours LOL.  I was up around 4am, but seriously feel so much more rested!  Hopefully this keeps up!  I like and need my sleep!  I stopped taking my sleeping pills bc they weren’t working anyway, and was told I could have sleep apnea which when taking sleeping meds, could actually make me not sleep.  Either way I didn’t sleep lol.

Yesterday my mom turned 56.  Most people freak as they age no matter how old they are.  I actually don’t mind aging.  What bothers me, is seeing my parents age!  My dad is going to be 60 next year!  Now I know 60 isn’t old and he is in amazing shape, but 60 is too old for my dad to be for my liking lol.  I worry and I detest them getting older bc I want them around forever!  I’m such a moosh ball.

Anyway, I went up to my mom’s and we had an early celebration at lunch time since it was on a Friday and Nick would be going to his dad’s around dinner time.  Had cake… I now hate that cake LOL.  It was good though   Got to spend time with my little nephew, then my sis after he left, and didn’t feel too sick.  My heart rate stayed around 130 standing, 100 sitting which is great for me, and normal to high blood pressure, so yay! lol Sounds bad, but pots people know what I mean lol.

Showing off his assets lol

Also wikid news, I wont the contest on the 5 Awesome Potsies channel on YouTube! (link in the side bar) I realistically thought it would be impossible to win since I was usually too sick to do video replies, and had no one to get to join the channel, so I figured there was no way.  I especially thought so, when they announced the 2nd and 3rd place winners the day before, bc I knew there was no way in hell I’d get 1st…

So I got the option between one of three prizes.  A tote bag… thought no, I have a thousand already, a pillow… no my cat would take that over and I’d never get to use it, and a water bottle… water/pots/hydration/something I’d actually use.. went with that lol.  It has the 5 Awesome Potsies logo on it and a little saying underneath (forget what it says) so I’m excited to get it!  I’ll post a picture one I receive it from the ladies.

They’re all terribly adorable and sweet, and I think the world of them, so it was really nice to win something.  Kyli who does the Thursday videos, was one of the first people I found with pots when I was waiting to be diagnosed and wanted to learn more about it.  I learned so much from her and now the other 4 too about great tips, since living with pots, means more learning to manage from home then with the doctors.

Reply to Hillary's med.s - most of my daily's

I created another facebook account just for my potsie friends.  I know it’s hard listening about an illness someone doesn’t understand, but I also need to be able to spread info. to the others, and be able to vent more easily.  They are the ones that know first hand what I’m going through, and in turn, end up being a huge support system for me, so I made it so I can post these entries on there as well.  I think the only non pots person I have on it, is my mom.

So coming up, I’m going back to my family doctor about my test results, and I want to get a copy of the info. from my tilt table test, so I can have it for when researching online.  Also getting a referral to the sleep clinic, which happens to be right next door to her lol.  My social worker is going to take me.  She’s so sweet, she brought me by homemade cream of broccoli soup!

Mom & Nick before blowing out the candles!

Then I have my dietitian appointment to work with whatever my test results say.. I should think it will be the last time I see her.  I hope lol.  She’s been awesome about vitamins but food wise, I already know it all for Crohn’s and POTS she hasn’t a clue on of course.

Anyway, that’s it for now!  Just wanted to share the latest! *hugs to all*

Ash,

PS: I still haven’t done the V-Log… I just don’t want my scariness on video when I feel like crap! LOL

Murdering

Love watching or reading those novels (Ann Rule rocks!) about murders.  I don’t know why,  but it’s really interesting to me lol.  Especially serial killers.  I guess it explains why I want to work with men in prison lol.  Creepy but too interesting to stay away from… with armed guards and drooling German Shepards too of course lol.  This one is about the Belush murders… I think I wrote their name right lol.

from Marlene

Marlene my PSW which I mention from time to time, is from Peru.  They eat their dinner at lunch time, and since she comes to my place in the late morning, she always cooks me a yummy Peruvian meal and I have it for left overs at our dinner time later.  It’s full of salt and always great tasting, which is awesome for my pots bc it helps raise my blood pressure back to normal.  (That’s right!  Constant low blood pressure now, even when I’m feeling half decent.)  But anyway, as good as it is for my pots, it’s horrifying my crohn’s disease and making my stomach feel like freddy krueger is inside trying to get out alien style through the belly lol.  I don’t know if it’s the food (she fries a lot of the stuff and adds things like vinegar, etc.) or if it’s the time I’m eating.  I do notice if my stomach hurts, it’s usually at night, after dinner time.  I really think it’s just the heaviness of the meal no matter when I eat it, but in our culture that’s usually dinner time, but I have to be able to get protein and I can’t eat a lot of fish, and the only nuts I can have are peanuts, and that’s only sometimes.  So how the hell am I supposed to get it?  Any ideas people?  I need to be eating smaller meals with little to no meat, and if so, only chicken.

for Zeus

So I checked out an apartment yesterday which is 3 blocks from my place, but it’s in a BAD area.  City like of course, it takes only two blocks, more like one, to be in a bad area (I’m in a good one here weirdly enough) and there’s no bus near by.  The nearest one, is the one that’s two blocks from here in the other direction, so it would be even further to walk lol.  It was really nice though!  Lots of windows, open concept, big bedroom, and a little storage space, but I’m not going to take it.  I want to be off the ground floor so I can open my windows at night while I sleep without worrying if someone is going to break in.  I’m in a basement now, but even a first floor doesn’t really do any good in that area.  But then I’d have to be in a building with an elevator.  BLAH! lol.  I’m glad I can afford to be picky, bc my lease isn’t up here until November.

Speaking of Marlene… she noticed Zeus drinks out of a mug… yes… he does lol.  He refuses to drink out of a cat dish.  He’ll either drink out of the toilet *gags* and get water on the toilet seat lol or drinks out of my water glass!  Which I REALLY don’t like if he drinks out of the toilet bowl! lol.  So I remembered my friend said his cats were the same way and used glasses, so I got a mug out and BOOM no more sharing my water, or checking the toilet seat for water splashes lol.  Sweet Marlene though, went out and bought Zeus a ceramic cat dish for him, thinking if it was made of something like the mug (he was using a steel dish before) then maybe he’d drink out of it lol.  Too cute.  I’m surprised she likes him bc he screams at her the whole time I’m in the bath bc I shut the door and he can’t get in lol, then runs away from her if she tries to console him.  He’s getting used to her now though.  If I’m around he’ll let her pet him, and he’ll stick his face in her shoes and purse to smell her pets lol.

The weather has been great here.  Warm today, but no major humidity or anything, so I love it   I haven’t been out a lot, but it’s been more tolerable for when I have been.

Got the The Fury, which is the books the show, The Vampire Diaries is made from.  I thought they’d be dumb, but a friend reassured me they were great, so I figured I’d give them a go and see lol.  I couldn’t start at The Awakening bc the library sucks!  lol.

So if any of you remember me mentioning Candace (the social service worker student) she and her friends are going to be in a MTV reality tv show!  I’m excited to watch it bc I think the world of her, and her friends seem hilarious, so you all need to join the facebook group for updates to watch the show when it starts!   I’ll mention more when I find out too, and post the link to the group in the side bar.

Next week is my dietitian appointment, so I’ll write more then and then more often after wards since I have a lot of appointments coming up the week after.

Take care

Ash,

PS  True Blood Season 3 this Sunday at 9pm! WOO HOO!