Dragging

homemade cleaners

homemade cleaners

I am having a rough time lately.  It’s setting my depression off.  Not all the time, just when my POTS gets really active, or I’m doing something really hard, like laundry, etc.  I seriously want to drop and cry my eyes out.

I had my Neurologist appointment.  He truly thinks my POTS is in remission, and is now worried something is wrong with my heart.  It’s been over worked for more than 10 yrs now, and bc I am not fainting, but feeling like I am just going to collapse doing stuff, he thinks it’s bc my body is running too fast.

working on my friend's fox scarf.  almost done!

working on my friend’s fox scarf. almost done!

So he is going to set me up for a stress test/ poor man’s tilt test.  If everything with my heart is good, which I am sure it is, then I go in for my second Tilt Table Test.  (See page on here to see what that is).  I am happy that he is doing something at least, but I do believe it’s POTS bc standing to change the loads of laundry, caused my feet to go purplish blue.  All the classic symptoms too when standing… out of breath like I’ve ran a marathon, shaking, sweating, nausea, dizziness.  I do dread the idea of the tilt test bc it’s basically putting a POTSy is the worst situation to see what they do.  Worth it, but still frustrating to have to do.  What else is there though?

Aug1 001

a side table I am redoing, and making the bottom into a bed for Zeus

Going to my friend Lana’s place to watch the rest of The Walking Dead season, and got to go out with my friends Nicole, Adam and their pup I adore, Lily.  It seriously killed me, and we basically did nothing.  Thank God for friends like them, who get that I can’t go out for very long, or really do much without needing a rest.  I feel like I’m pushing myself too hard just to not even keep up with life, and when friends expect me to be around and social, even just to sit around, literally, it wipes me right out.

I fell asleep last night around 7, shortly after I got home from the dr.s.  Woke up around 4:30am, back asleep by 6am until around 10 or so, then back asleep until almost 1pm.  I’m just so damn tired 😦

new kitty treats for Zeus.  you know they're good when he likes them!

new kitty treats for Zeus. you know they’re good when he likes them!

Reading a book about Russell Williams.  Really good so far.  Watching Ghost Adventures, trying to stay awake a bit longer.  I need to stop watching this show bc they are constantly in my dreams now lol.

Will make a separate page for the furniture I am working on redoing.

Take Care.

Ash,

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