Seems like the second i get my walls crumbled down, and i stop focusing on them, they build right back up. So here i am writing!
Been focusing on learning my tarot decks. I have an amazing memory when im not sick, so im going to get this shit, if it takes me forever lol. Theyre all so different! Then i will work on my oracles.
Starting next week, my YouTube will be starting w astrological element horoscopes weekly, and on my website starting in June, I will have a monthly horoscope for each sign individually.
I was able to get my crohns infusion, Remicade this morning. The steroids cause me a lot of back and joint pain, the Benadryl makes me a walking zombie when given through I.V. and the Remicade renders me sicker than a dog for 3-7 days roughly. After that I will be feeling better than i was hopefully. My nurse even offered to get me in a week earlier next time to get it that much quicker.
Hard to explain, but when you’re sick you get sad… obviously, just look at the man cold lol. It’s not okay, to be okay w being sick. Especially chronically. They did a bunch of studies on actual depression w crohns disease, and found when relapsing. It actually can make your depression relapse. If you’re stressed enough though, that can make your crohns relapse though too! Lol.
It is imperative that i stay stress free, bc not only will i be in horrids amount of pain and throwing up, or going on a Tylenol 3 binge from gallbladder and crohns attacks that feel the same as contractions that make you throw up non stop, but then I have chronic fatigue that will make me rest and crash for a whole day.
People do not get, that stress and diet are sooo important. I would love to have enough money to eat all month…to be able to have fresh food that’s healthy all month would be a dream!
I have two illnesses that i deal w primarily. My own family can’t tell me what POTS stands for, or even means, and I write a blog with all the information about it above! Why do people not give a shit?! They claim to be loyal, etc. But they don’t even care that going to get a glass of water, results in me walking 15 ft, to drop to the ground to catch my breath, but the drs say I’m getting better? I think I’d have to drop dead before they’d pay any attention.
Im a huge advocate for puttig your needs first, unless you have children. I truly believe people need to take care of themselves, to be a good friend, spouse, family member for their loved ones, but ppl are so fucking selfish, they only think of their wants… not needs ppl, but wants, that the ones that truly run themselves ragged for others, get stomped on and used, and seen as an easy offering, bc ppl just dont give a shit anymore!
Maybe im old fashioned, but when someone i know, not even a close friend, is down and sad, or sick, i want them to know they aren’t alone. I don’t push them away bc im too wrapped up in my own shit to see their pain. So if you’re my friend reading this, bc my family doesnt give a shit to read this blog and see how I’m doing, and you’re going through a hard time, no matter how big or small, i am here to be a friend. Just say the word. But if you are some dumb fuck who thinks of only your own needs, and plays the victim card, get the fuck out of my way, bc i dont need your bullshit.
On that note.. hope all the great mothers out there had a wonderful day Sunday, and happy belated nurses week! Nurses are the back bone to our care and well being, and a great nurse has love and passion for their job. So be thankful for the many amazing ones out there!
PS Sorry for the typos, but writing on tablet, and not laptop.